quaint little rutted bucket

Tuesday, June 15, 2004

Updatage 0604151832

Mozilla Firefox 0.9 is finally out! Get yours while they're hot! Here.

At 0.9, Mozilla Firefox is shaping up to be *the* Internet Explorer killer it was meant to be. Free, lean, fast and mean, it's by far the best alternative option out there. Powered by Mozilla.org's getting-faster-by-the-second Gecko rendering engine, all W3C-compliant pages work perfectly and have the assurance that you're getting what the developer intended you to have. Web browsing bliss? Almost. Just as long as the page you're viewing more or less follows the W3C standard specs for HTML 4 and other related web technologies. (There are still a good number of pages out the great Intarweb 'optimized' for IE, which really sux0rs. :)

A caveat, though: As always, not all themes and extensions you've had previously will work perfectly with this release. Firefox's theme and extension management components still need work and a finalized spec before heading off to 1.0, thus the incompatibility issues. But then again, we can always wait for the third-party devs to get their hands dirty and do some compatibility fixes. :)

And it bites. Again.

Regrets. Sigh. I hate when I have brushes with it, especially things concerning relationships.

The last time I had one, it was serious. But then, so is the entire world around me: She was off to UP for Biology, and with her dreams to become a doctor, I had to let her go. It was perhaps the most painful decision I had to make at that time, but it was between her happiness and me. I couldn't be selfish. She has her own life; own set of dreams to pursue, let alone fulfill. That perhaps the only consolation I have is that maybe, maybe she'll be better off without me. That maybe, she'll be able to find herself in what she wants to do.

She confronted me when I told her about the nasty word that starts with 'b'. That *I* was the one being selfish. The truth is, after she said that, I thought about. Maybe I'm just reluctant over the thought of intimacy. Or of getting closer. Or the fear of more commitment.

I figured no. I stuck with my decision. I saw things in her that, I felt, can be molded to greater things, given her personality and zest for living and doing good to others. I never wanted to hold her down; to limit her potential. She was a wonderful girl, but she has her own life, and that at this point in time, the only thing she doesn't need is somebody to take her time.

Now, she's a happy camper at Diliman. We still occasionally talk about stuff. I'll perhaps be the living testament that making friends with an ex is still hard. (I don't know about her. :) But then, we both figured that what we had wasn't that serious to be affecting us up to now. So with that resolved, everyone's happy. (She's dating somebody. And even joked about me getting jealous. No, I'm serious. I said no. Hahah. She asked me about my own lovelife, and I said I saw a few women who _might_ be worth my while, but never had the courage to stand up to them. Her reply? "Hay ralph, torpe ka pa rin. Hahah."

I nary talk about things concerning this side of my life, but as it occured almost two years ago, I figured people ought to know. Or so the people who read this digital rag.

But silly me, this isn't about her. It's about me. The thing is, I had gotten over her. This one, not.

There's still a part of me who sees her in every young woman who sports long hair, that waifish build, and an almost-morena complexion. Ack. Obsession? Infatuation? I dunno. The only thing I have is regret. Regret that I'd never gotten to know her. Regret that I didn't even had the courage to try. That I hid behind a veil of anxiety, fear, uncertainty and doubt, saying that I'm content to just admire her from afar. The truth is, I'm not content with that. Ack Ralph, you can't even try. Sigh.

Spotlight song of the moment: Side A's "So Many Questions".


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